One of my favorite things about attending music conferences and festivals are the crazy comments that you hear along the way. Here are a few choice selections.
Lets cut the small talk, I got a new record out. It’s already a million seller. I got a million of ‘em in the cellar.
You’re fucking quiet. We could all just chat and stuff.
Scott Kempner of the Del-Lords
On this version lets change the music and the words. Keep it fresh.
Brian Henneman of the Bottle Rockets, preparing to do a second take of the one song that they played during a CMT Edge taping
This is called “No One Knows Nothing Anymore.” I’d like to dedicate this to the major labels.
In this digital world where songwriter credits have disappeared along with royalties….
Robert Hunter, accepting his Lifetime Achievement Award for songwriting
Thanks. You oughta hear that one in tune.
I’m a little out of tune but I’m going to play a blues song so it’s OK.
You guys are like the two old men from the Muppet show up there.
Matt Mays, to the sound guys perched on a balcony in the back of the High Watt club
I borrowed the title from the Ray Bradbury novel, only to be informed that it is actually from Shakespeare.
Lucinda Williams, introducing her song titled “Something Wicked This Way Comes”
I got these short pants on. No peeking. Keep your eyes up here.
Mojo Nixon, referring to his shorts as he sat down on a high stool
One of the reasons that I started working with Plowboy [Records] was I was told that I could subvert country music from within.
Legendary punk songwriter and guitarist Cheetah Chrome
I’m the office boy.
Cheetah Chrome, on his role at Plowboy Records
I’ve known this guy since we wore dog collars together back in the 1977.
Cheetah Chrome, introducing Alejandro Escovedo
Escovedo: So you remember?
Drummer: I know the name.
Escovedo: That’s good. My band doesn’t remember the name.
Alejandro Escovedo, teaching the house band one of his songs
Parker Millsap: Did you just call him ‘Cracker’?
CMT crew member: That’s his name.
Exchange while Millsap was setting up for a performance at the CMT Studios
We did a tour together in June and I’m lucky to be alive.
Joe Fletcher, on touring with JP Harris
I sarcastically said that this song was my version of Taylor Swift’s “We Are Never Getting Back Together.” The journalist misinterpreted it and wrote that I was inspired by it.
Samantha Crain, introducing her song “I’m Never Going Back”
Nashville has a problem with body parts.
Lucinda Williams, quoting Robbie Fulks on the Nashville establishment’s hesitation to promote certain songs
The one advantage of being in a band that looks like roadies is that you actually are roadies.
Brian Henneman of the Bottle Rockets
There ain’t nothing better than a real honest to God encore. A lot of bands do the bullshit encore.
Brian Henneman of the Bottle Rockets.
I’d like to play one from his back catalog, meaning pre-Mermaid Avenue.
Billy Bragg, introducing his cover of Woody Guthrie’s “I Ain’t Got No Home. “
That’s like bucket list stuff for a record store.
Grimey, of Grimey’s Record Store, after Billy Bragg played his entire first album in the parking lot behind the store
Miller Lite, the beer of kings.
My dad is hunting or he would be here tonight.
Holly Williams, accepting Hank Williams’ lifetime achievement award at the Americana Music Awards
I don’t know why you’re clapping, the man just died.
John Fullbright, responding to the applause after he played his song “Fat Man”
We’re 31 years old and they think we are emerging.
The Milk Carton Kids
[We played] rockabilly before they had a name for it. We just thought it was hopped up country music.
We’re the organization that used to Sue people.
Cary Sherman, CEO of the RIAA, introducing himself
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Photo credits: Mayer Danzig.