One of my favorite parts of SXSW is the crazy things you see and hear along the way. Here are a few choice selections.
This is how we fucking roll in Austin Texas. Steve Wertheimer, proprietor of the Continental Club introducing Alejandro Escovedo. Amen, Brother Steve.
What’s going on? Stewardess on my flight to Austin, enquiring why the plane was so full
The SXSW music festival. The woman sitting next to me
What’s that, a country music festival? The Stewardess (I wish I could have introduced her to Steve W.)
Can I get less of that band in my monitor? The bassist with Lydia Loveless referring to the metal band playing next door. It’s tough to play opposite a metal band.
They say that the music industry is dead. Then how do you account for 900 bands from around the world and thousands of people [at SXSW]. It’s the contract between you and I. Thank you for honoring the contract. Jon Dee Graham. Amen, Brother Jon Dee.
Are you Scottish? Guy in audience
Scottish as fuck, my friend. Louis Abbott from Glasgow band Admiral Fallow
Thanks for coming out early. If you’re as hung over as I am, I know it was a real effort. Kevin Hilliard of Small Sins
The thing I don’t like is that there’s no food here. Guy #1
We’re at a bike shop, you’ve got to put it in perspective. Guy #2.
Overheard in the beer line at a showcase in a bike shop. Never try to reason with someone who is drunk.
Interpretive. We’re gonna dance like the wind, girls. Jon Dee Graham, providing direction to the two waitresses who jumped on stage to dance while he and the band played.
Quick John, go get my little white pills out of my glovebox. Jon Dee Graham, a few minutes later.
Whoever is calling me, I can’t hear you. Text me. Andy Clockwise answering his cell right at the start of his set.
I can’t let you in at all. Bouncer
‘Cause of that shirt. Bouncer
I was wearing a Red Sox t-shirt, he was wearing a Yankees cap. Even in Austin… We agreed to disagree and I went in.
Do you want to hear more sad songs played quickly? Kasey Anderson
We’ve got merch in the back with Billy. Billy, the intern/tour manager/guy who just wanted to go to SXSW. Jeremy Messersmith
Where’d you get that? Guy asking where I got the wristband needed for getting free drinks at a day party.
You got one too, it’s on your wrist. Me.
This is my favorite Townes Van Zandt song. Kasey Anderson, introducing his cover of Cee-Lo Green’s “Fuck You.”
Stay hydrated, sweat on a friend. Tunde Adebimpe of TV on the Radio
Show us your tits. Drunk heckler (standing next to me, unfortunately)
Show us yours. Louis Abbott from Admiral Fallow
If you want it pretty, it’s not going to be. Carrie Brownstein from Wild Flag. She was right. It wasn’t pretty, but it was damn good.
We’ve never played in a bike shop before. But they’ve got really good acoustics. Yuck
This is a song about how terrible you men are. But women are probably worse. Syd Straw
“Fuck you it’s green” hand-scrawled note on a yellow t-shirt, St. Patty’s day
This is normally a comedy club and the only thing not funny is everybody sitting down. Jeff Klein of My Jerusalem
I need more Adderall in my monitor, I need more orange juice in my kitchen. Brooklyn rappers Das Racist. Not sure why I found this funny.
Any party with free whiskey and J Roddy [Walston & the Business] is fine by me. Anonymous
We came to play. Steve Wynn, who played more than 12 shows with his various bands (Steve Wynn & the Miracle 3, the Baseball Project and the Minus 5)
You said I wasted your time, that’s ok ’cause you wasted mine. Between you and nothing, I choose nothing at all. Lyric from my new favorite song, by Maxim Ludwig & the Santa Fe Seven
We do not have water for 100k people. We have bottled water for 2 dollars. Sign on bar
I can’t return this. Rhett Miller, after cutting his finger and bleeding on his new guitar.
This may break the record for the most times that someone says the F world in church. Chris Mansfield of Fences performing his song “Girls with Accents” in St. David’s Historic Sanctuary. The chorus was a repetitive “I’m fucking up everything.”
We’ve got some cds for sale in the back. They’re 1k each but they’re worth it. Kevin Hilliard of Small Sins
Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to get through this thing called SXSW. Kevin Preston of Prima Donna kicking off the band’s set
I am Mojo Nixon and you are drunk. Mojo Nixon
“Drinks well with others” t-shirt seen at Mojo Nixon day party.
I’m all for screwing over the man. I’m not for screwing the other bands. Jeremy Messersmith, in response to audience requests for an encore.
View more Twangville coverage of SXSW 2011 here.
About the author: Mild-mannered corporate executive by day, excitable Twangville denizen by night.